Here you’ll find a FAQ for now that I’ll be expanding considering the questions that I get.
This means here will appear your most prevalent questions. And I’ll point you to where you get most of your questions answered.
Can I promise you that no questions will be left open? No, definitely not. Because many times – depending on your level, your experience, your point of view, what you’re after and so on – the questions will be completely different. It can be as big as life.
Click on the question to reveal the answers or pointers where to continue.
How do I know I got a deep emotional connection with someone?
You will notice when they show their real face.
I mean like if they open up to a level where they feel they don’t need to hide so much anymore from you.
Because you know that as well, right? Because why should you open up completely in the first place talking to a complete stranger?
You’re most likely to open up more later in the process.
What is an emotional connection?
A connection is a bond, a link or tie to something or someone.
You may also read why is an emotional connection of tremendous value?
Which topic creates a deep emotional connection?
There is not a single topic that creates a deep emotional connection just because you chose that topic.
This would be very easy, yet. And many people will give you the advice to stay away from talking about a job.
Talking about a job itself it’s not the problem. It’s how people go about talking about someone’s job.
Can you point me to a deep emotional connection scene in a movie?
There’s actually an interesting scene right here:
What is active listening?
Active listening means that you actively try to understand what’s offered to you.
It contains amongst other things and skills:
- listening consciously
- shutting down your inner dialogue
- being focused on the person your talking to
- being fully present
- being in your body
- providing them with the gift of your full attentive energy
- asking to understand not to interrupt
- Letting them think if you made them think. Don’t interrupt their thinking process.
- The best listeners will even tell them back things thay may not even be aware they’ve uttered.
- Making an active effort to make talking to you a good experience.
What is empathy?
Just read the article about what is empathy. This will give you more insights.
But in short: the ability to understand and share the feelings of another.
What is the difference between plain communication and emotional connection?
A plan communication or conversation is about exchanging words.
An emotional connection is about changing feelings, emotions, sensations. It’s about exchanging humanity.
Can this be done in any language?
Yes. As far as I know, I didn’t come across any language yet which doesn’t allow me to build a deep emotional connection.
We had a deep conversation about philosophy, religion, politics, spirituality. Why didn’t it produce the effects you talk about here?
Because you most probably stayed surface all the time. The topic itself is not responsible for creating a deep emotional connection with someone just like that. You’re responsible to lead it there.
How can I acquire the skill to create a deep emotional connection on my terms? So I can decide to go there with someone whenever I want?
This could literally fill a book. For example one of the size I am in the process of writing.
So we can talk further.
What is the most important about a deep emotional connection in general?
Respect and integrity. Those are the absolute basics.
How long does it take to master this skill on my own?
This definitely depends completely on you:
How self-reflective are you?
How aware are you of your repeating patterns?
What do you do to change them?
How long does it take you to change them?
Did you get rid of all the pitfalls already?
Are you a fast learner?
Are you willing to take the hurdles?
Are you willing to push through? On your own?
Are you good at motivating yourself without external help?
And so on.
Consider please also the following articles:
To find out what knowledge to gain:
Basic knowlegde, like why you could even acquire the skills to improve your life:
- How can I connect on a deeper level, even if I don’t know what to talk about?
- A Deep Connection – What is it?
- Why an Emotional Connection?
- Why is a Deep Emotional Connection of Tremendous Value?
How to make some first steps on your own (increasing your self-reflection):
- How Do I Know if my Connection to Someone Is Special? – 7 Signs
- Want to Improve your Conversations Big Time? Just do This:
Do I have to become a deep emotional connection skilled coach if I just want to learn the skill?
No. You don’t have to become a coach. But you’ll definitely become much more aware of what’s going on that you couldn’t see before. I don’t want to make you a connection coach if that’s not what you’ve signed up for. I just wanna help you get there so you can create a deep emotional connection with someone new whenever you decide to do so.
I want to ask you personally about something, how can I reach out?
Use the button below those questions to leave a message.
Or hop over to the contact form.
I just asked deeper questions. It didn’t work, why?
Most probably you asked questions that pointed directly to something where you didn’t create enough context or you’re not even at the right level yet. So your conversation partner didn’t get enough context to be able to answer.
Or you committed one of the “crimes” listed in the pitfalls. Get rid of these.
I got a question from the person I am talking to like "Are you a hobby psychologist?" or "Well done Sherlock!" and so on. Why?
Most likely you dug too deep immediately. You rushed the process. This comes across as quite phony. Not showing genuine interest. Maybe you got a background agenda because you wanna get something from the other person.
Why is there a need to rush? Let me ask you back: Did you enjoy the conversation just for the sake of it?
You may also wanna consider those 2 articles:
Is there a book about this?
Yes. I am actually in the process of writing a book about the whole process. Trying to leave out as little as possible.
When it’s online? When it’s done!
Why do people sometimes suddenly behave completely differently when we had connected on a deeper level?
That’s quite normal. Because if you create a safe emotional environment without judgments and all the other things needed to be set correctly it’s easy to open up. Because no judgment of identity occurs. No comparison. No rejection of any part of personality. This is a very healthy emotional environment wherein people can open up happy to be sharing. And there’s no competition taking place as well.
It got also to do with there persona which is active. Often not on purpose. But it is still there.